Mediation Intake/Assessment

Explained

If you have never been through the family mediation process before you might be anxious about your intake/assessment session. Well, let me make it a little easier for you and explain what usually happens at the intake/assessment stage of the mediation process.

The first step of the mediation process is the intake/assessment. You will have a private and confidential conversation individually with the mediator. This is an opportunity for the mediator to provide each party with information about the mediation process and for each party to ask any questions that they might have. The mediator will highlight some and not limited to the following matters:

• Confidentiality in the mediation process.

• Mediator neutrality and impartiality.

• Who makes decisions in the mediation process.

• A run-down of what the process looks like in a nutshell.

• Costs.

• Future focus.

• The type of agreement that can be reached and any legalities/ limitations with the agreement.

• Certificates for parenting matters.

• Referrals to other services if required.

Mediators have to ascertain if mediation is suitable for the parties or if the Family Courts might be a better avenue for the parties involved. The mediator uses their discretion to come to a decision based on each party’s responses. The mediator will ask about some of the following:

• the history of the relationship.

• any court orders or intervention/restraining orders.

• the safety and well-being of all children in the family.

• party expectations, in terms of outcomes.

• willingness to participate in the mediation process with the other party/willingness to negotiate.

• the safety and well-being of the parties involved.

• the property pool i.e. assets and debts for property matters including any international properties.

The questions that mediators ask are quite comprehensive, the above list is in umbrella terms and nowhere near exhaustive, however it gives you an idea of some of the likely questions that you could be asked under that umbrella.

It is always good to do some research prior to your mediation session. This enables you to clarify anything that you might not be sure about. It also means that you can start thinking about and processing agenda items that you would like to bring up, not only in the intake/assessment session, but in the mediation session when you get to that stage.

When considering proposals and your expected outcome, it is important that you think about your best case scenario or ideal and two other variables that might not necessarily be your ideal, but options that you can live with. This leaves room for negotiating. We have found that mediation can be quite difficult where parties have a fixed position, with no room for movement .

Some parties might want to seek legal advice prior to the mediation session, others like to hold off until after the mediation process. We always recommend that parties seek legal advice in order to be informed about your matter.

Things that might not particularly be helpful in the intake/assessment are:

• not being truthful.

• trying to sway the mediator to side with you.

• instead of explaining your story in line with what the mediator might be asking, going on the route of ex-bashing with no end in sight.

• Attacking, lashing out at or being rude to the mediator.

• Assuming that the mediator will take the side of the other party.

• Assumptions in general can be detrimental.

Remember the mediator will not take sides and neither are they there to judge you. We want to guide you and hear your story to enable us to assist you through the process as best as we can . We will offer information and support for each party individually, in preparation for the mediation sessions.

If you require further assistance to prepare for your mediation session consider booking a coaching session with us here.